How a psychopath views you
One of the reasons I’m allowed here is the extent to which I am able to ‘reveal’ or illuminate the psychopathic condition through not only what I say but how I say it. Some posts, through their subject matter, will reveal more than others. That is not something which especially interests me, but since it’s important to someone, it is fair to say that this is probably one of those extra-revelatory posts.
People are resources to be used like any other. But they’re not all the same, they are individuals. I don’t need to label them in order to interact with them. All the same, for the people I come into contact with, I categorise them into four different groups based on their value to me. I say “I categorise them”, it’s not something I’m overly conscious of, but when I interact with a specific person I conceptualise and treat them based on their group. And like I said, I’m not talking about people’s objective value, just their value in relation to my needs and wants.
So enough waffling already, what are the groups?
- Useful – people to be used for something of value they have. They’re a pretty common type. Analogous with tools.
- Entertainment – people with whom I interact for pleasure. Not too many at the minute, though obviously their number goes up and down as people come and go. Analogous with toys, and in some favourable cases, pets.
- Threat – people who may cause problems for my wellbeing. The least common group by far.
- Unimportant – people who have no value, either positive or negative, to me. Basically most people on the planet.
One issue with this list is it could be argued that entertainment is just a more specific form of usefulness; the person’s utility lies in their entertainment value. People whose entertainment value is very great may become my friends. I’ll have to talk about friends in another post.
So which are you? Well, you’re reading this so I guess you’re helping to support one of my hobbies, which makes you a cause of my entertainment. On the other hand, most of you are silent readers and for all I know you’re not the same crowd from week to week, which would make the individual reader rather unimportant. Nevertheless, that status belies how I really feel about you who read my posts; I greatly value your continued interest in what I’ve got to say – why else would I write?
Should you leave a comment, you’d certainly stand a good chance of an upgrade. And you’d be able to tell whether it worked from my reaction. If I reply, you’ve become entertainment in yourself. It doesn’t take much, just a comment that isn’t completely unintelligible or boring. Who knows, you may even share information so valuable that you become useful, for a while.
You can of course be more than one thing at a time; people I make use of may also be people I like. It’s when you’re just the former but you think you’re the latter where problems are generated – for you. So if you had a really charming friend or lover who left you one day without a backward glance, and whom you now believe to be a psychopath, it was almost certainly the case that you were only being used for whatever your ‘friend’ or ‘lover’ wanted at the time. When they left, it was because they decided that – what is that phrase again? – your usefulness was at an end. Still, at least they didn’t snap you in half on their knee.
Unimportant or not, your views are bound to interest someone. So leave a comment!
Mike 17:27 on September 29, 2017 Permalink |
Hi Amaterasu. Apologies long time to reply again. Mmm, interesting. Went to see a therapst & apparantlly I’m a borderline whatever that means. Ok, so, am I choosing to anger ? Mmm, it presupposes I have control over my emotions, yet anger to me feels like a reaction. If tell myself to choose to react different I feel I’m trying to suppress the cells I’m made of which are telling me it’s a threat/enemy of my ex girlfriend rather like a caveman or jellyfish response to danger who has a nasty effect on my ability to feel equilibrium. In other words all I feel is rage. I will try to tell myself, no Mike, now stop it, you’ve just walked past & seen the nasty piece of crap who’s continuing to pester me by being in my area when she doesn’t even live there now, stay ca,m and ,ok, I choose to feel forgiveness and pleasure and peaceful. Ok, in theory it might work, but what do I do when 5 seconds later, whaaam, sod that and the anger smacks me straight in the face again ! See the problem 😡 but yes, thanks, I will definitely try your suggestion. By the way , is that a DBT technique?
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Amaterasu Solar 17:34 on September 29, 2017 Permalink |
From the time something emotionally impactful occurs to the time You can take control is 2 seconds. Yes, once those two seconds pass, what You choose to think about and how You choose to think about what You choose to think about allow You to control the feelings You have, including anger. You don’t tell Yourself to choose differently… You ask Yourself if there is a better choice and let Your subconscious work on it. As for the “technique…” I don’t know what “DBT” is. I arrived at My awareness through reading William Glasser’s Choice Theory (which is more a fact than a theory, based on My experiments with it…).
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Mike 15:38 on October 1, 2017 Permalink |
I’ll check out this a William Glasser’s book. So see her, get angry and what, count to 2 ?
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Amaterasu Solar 17:30 on October 1, 2017 Permalink |
As soon as You can, choose to think of something that makes You feel good – I usually think of kittens! LOL! – that has nothing to do with Her. Keep going back to that thought if You find You are thinking about Her. That’s one way. Or, think something like, Isn’t She pathetic, being there again! LOLOL! Meh, She’s irrelevant to Me! What You choose to think about and how You choose to think about what You choose to think about… Here’s a vid I did about that:
Let Me know Your thoughts.
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Anonymous 16:23 on May 14, 2019 Permalink |
The habit I got into as a child to distract myself from doing something while angry was to just be still and “blank” my mind. I like the kittens idea though because, depending on the situation, the other way doesn’t always work. I also find I am prone to do stupid things if I am excited about something. Basically, any kind of arousal may distract me from my control.
I also agree – I don’t see people as inanimate objects as is always described. They are not the same as a toaster.🙄 I never really consciously thought about categories but that makes sense. It’s more like keep them (useful) get rid of them (not useful) or watch them (threats) and very carefully gather any information about them in case I need it later.
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Mike 23:53 on October 2, 2017 Permalink |
I like the concept of thinking something else when I walk past or see her by chance thanks I will certainly try it. Bit here’s the thing. I still feel like it’s forced although I certainly do believe that our thoughts form pathways in the brain & continually thinking painful thoughts strengthens & makes them worse . Yes , so by this token your suggestion makes logical sense. I will watch the video thanks & mail you after I’ve seen it. The only trouble I have with the Ida of thinking these different thoughts is that they are not my true feeling. Therefore I will be in a sense lying to myself. My true feelings tell me I want her to be accused of sexualy harassing men, inform her husband she is cheating & lying to him, & text her warning her not to pester me. That might make her realise how trying to dupe people doesn’t work. It’s the only language she would probably understand. I won’t do it because I have resoect for my higher self. But I suspect one day she’ll get her Karma by messing around someone worse than her at a time when she is weak. Haha, ok, now I’ve gone all borderline again (this is the psycho website right so what the heck) anyway, back to your suggestion. Thank you very much I will look at it this week. By the way, yes I’d love her to be different & get back with her in theory, but no I’m not pining after her, this is about anger & feeling abused by an idiot who refuses to speak because they don’t want to hear any truth that puts them in a bad light. I hate that, literally hate it .
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Amaterasu Solar 10:26 on October 3, 2017 Permalink |
You speak of “true feelings….” What are One’s “true feelings” but what One is feeling in the Now? If One is not thinking of things that upset One, One’s true feelings are those One feels about what One is thinking. If One changes how One is thinking about what One is thinking, One’s true feelings are those that are elicited by the thought process.
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Mike 12:31 on October 3, 2017 Permalink |
It works in theory. Perhaos not so with borderlines. No meter what I try ultimately my feelings or ‘reactions’ break through into the Now. I watched a bit of Glasser. I approve of it, nits something to use alongside being human as a sort of coping skill in my view , but it’s sort of impossible to be ‘completely ‘ zoomed out on it as humans we need to opine and let off steam etc. In that sense it almost whacks of a cult or a religion. But I do think it has value, I tried it today as I walked by. She wasn’t there thank F. Anyway I thought of kittens then I told myself she is a loser becasue she lost someone she said she loved (me) Then I walked past, then the pain blame critisism need to bribe etc … hate disgust pain and longing all came back as soon as I stopped thinking it !
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Amaterasu Solar 14:33 on October 3, 2017 Permalink |
Do understand that it does take practice – old pathways take a while to overwrite. As I mentioned, it took a while to stop choosing to depress. But eventually the new pathways were established – took a few months, as I had spent a couple decades building the depression pathways. Keep at it, and give it a bit of time. I think You will find that it works…
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Mike 13:51 on October 4, 2017 Permalink |
Mmm, ,maybe a bit
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Mike 13:53 on October 4, 2017 Permalink |
Was thinking am still in love with the nutcase, don’t like her at all though. It’s wierd how messed up everything is in life
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Mike 13:55 on October 4, 2017 Permalink |
Ultimately I suppose I feel sad and sorry for them because they are retarded emotionaly. Better be more careful who I choose to fall in love with next time , would you agree with that ?
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James 16:17 on October 4, 2017 Permalink |
Agree with all of that, but can’t help remarking that a borderline calling psychopaths “retarded emotionally” is like the mule calling the donkey stubborn 😀
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GeneticPsychosMom (Tina) 20:53 on October 6, 2017 Permalink |
It helps if you know what dysfunctional behaviors to look out for:
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James 16:14 on October 4, 2017 Permalink |
Life would be no fun without a bit of misery. I like to think we psychopaths help to add to the richness of life. Can certainly understand why others wouldn’t agree with that, however.
One thing we can perhaps all agree on is that you can’t expect a new coping technique, as recommended by Amaterasu, to work after just mere seconds of trying it out. These things take time. Think of it like learning a new skill; you can’t just read a book on (say) Japanese, and then expect to be able to go to Japan and speak to everyone in their language fluently. You need to practise; only then can you get good at Japanese, and only with practice can you train your mind into reacting in a more productive way which serves you well.
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Amaterasu Solar 20:56 on October 4, 2017 Permalink |
Yes, James, I would not agree that life would be no fun without a bit of misery. My life was very rich without misery. It’s rich now only by virtue of My work to solve for psychopaths in control. Other than that, it is quite poor.
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Mike 18:46 on October 7, 2017 Permalink |
Hehe,nice one, Is a borderline the same as a psychopath ?
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James 13:07 on October 8, 2017 Permalink |
Not at all, but there are similarities. Both are considered to be cluster B personality disorders (well “psychopathy” is actually called antisocial personality disorder in that sense) along with narcissistic personality disorder and histrionic personality disorder.
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Mike 16:35 on October 10, 2017 Permalink |
Mmm, yeah I always thought there was something different about me. Apparently I’m narsisitc as well. What are the similarities?
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James 09:26 on October 11, 2017 Permalink |
I’m not going to spoon-feed you information. There is plenty of stuff readily available online. Search Psychology Today (https://www.psychologytoday.com/) or even Wikipedia.
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Mike 21:21 on October 12, 2017 Permalink |
Hehe, yeah that’s right. Interesting, I’ll take a look
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Mike 00:46 on October 13, 2017 Permalink |
So James, I wonder if its possible to get even with an ex partner if they are a psychopath playing the devalue & discard routine
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James 05:46 on October 13, 2017 Permalink |
Just murder her I suppose 😉
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Mike 01:34 on October 14, 2017 Permalink |
☺
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Mike 12:32 on October 14, 2017 Permalink |
Well i wont kill her. Maybe I’ll just write her husband a nice little letter exposing his wife’s lying and cheating . Haha. Love to see the look on her stupid face when he confronts her. Classic. I’d like to film ot and put on youtube 🙂 I could watch it over and over and show it to all my friends and post it to all her friends. Oh well, I suppose ill just have to let the stuupid cow just get away with it. Nevermind
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Remia 08:21 on November 6, 2017 Permalink |
How interesting. Last year someone asked me how I viewed other people and I said to him “Useful as a tool, useful as entertainment, a threat, or completely useless to me”. This was when I was fifteen and I always believed that everyone secretly feels this way but few readily accept this viewpoint. I never really knew that these views were exclusive to psychopaths
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James 13:02 on November 6, 2017 Permalink |
Then you’re learning. Knowledge is power. Good luck to you.
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Dante e Soignoli 23:50 on August 9, 2018 Permalink |
Hey James, this really impacted me. I liked every bit on it. It helped me put a name on something ive been hiding. I rrally like how you subdivide people. I didnt know this but i do it too. I would love to talk more im private. Ill be entertainment and you be of use to me as i want to learn more.
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James 19:54 on August 11, 2018 Permalink |
This is private enough for now. When do you start being entertaining?
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Tim Davis 10:56 on March 1, 2021 Permalink |
Nice article, nice info for who is suffering from anxiety and depression.
https://www.hupcfl.com
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