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  • James 19:15 on November 20, 2018 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , Crna Gora, , Kotor, Montenegro, , psychopath, , , , ,   

    Postcard to myself 

    20181120_200645

    There are venomous snakes in this box. You think it’s chocolates and that I’m sorry, but I’m not and it’s snakes.

    I have been going through some cards, letters and postcards from my life up until now. My old room is getting ripped out and replaced with something new, to cater to my parents’ obsession with decorating and modernising their house, so all these forgotten bits and pieces have been coming to light for the first time in 10, 15, in some cases 20, years. What can I say? I’m a magpie.

    And there’s this stash of old post, which has given me a new perspective on my upbringing. Because I was relatively late to become aware of psychopathy and specifically that it pertained to who I am (this I discovered at the age of 18; I’m now 25), I have been under the impression that other people in my life were similarly clueless about my nature. Not so.

    There’s the card in the picture, sent to me one Christmas by a school friend, who wrote that it “reminded me of you… happy Xmas, you weirdo.” There’s another card, sent by family friends, with reference to an atlas they bought me: “You always said you wanted to take over the world. Let this inspire you.” Rereading that today reminded me that, yes, I was a megalomaniacal motormouth at one stage of my childhood, and had evidently revealed some or all of my plans to this family – rookie Bond villain mistake. And that is why I will never get the chance to be tried for war crimes in The Hague.

    Then there was this bizarre Wallace and Gromit birthday card, sent to my grandad from all of my family, which read inside, in my mother’s spiky handwriting: “Happy birthday, Dad. This card was chosen by Jamie on the understanding that you’ll post it back to him.” It was dated 1997; I was three. Little control freak.

    Sure, so there’s no smoking gun. No “Ohhh my God, my baby’s a psycho, what do I dooo?” letter. But there’s knowledge – and acceptance – of my personality. I’m lucky to have parents who have never tried to deny who I am, and who have supported me from the start. It just goes to show that sometimes close friends and family know you better than you do yourself.


    Image result for kotor postcard

    In the same pile, I also came across a postcard from Montenegro, sent in 2008 by me… to me. It was postmarked and everything, sent par avion across Europe from the tiny Balkan state to my home in England. This is it, folks – peak narcissism:

    Dear future self,

    Ha! Ha! I’m on holiday, you’re not!

    Classy.

    It goes on –

    Hope the ol’ ear has cleared up by the time I get this.

    Oh, that’s right. I got an ear infection from the poorly-chlorinated swimming pool. I had to get some strange ear potion from the apothecary in Kotor. Yes, apothecary;  Montenegro’s a hell of a place.

    I am sitting on my apartment’s balcony. Jealous?

    Yes. Fuck you.

    Anyway, fuck you.

    Be you later,

    James

    Great, well thanks for that, 15-year old James.

    The moral of the story? Never meet your heroes, because they’re sure to disappoint.

     
    • nowve666 20:53 on November 20, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      This is the weirdest post of yours I’ve seen. So you wrote a postcard to your “future self” and taunted your future self that you were on vacation and he (you) were not?

      Like

    • 1jaded1 21:42 on November 20, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      I laughed and I’m not ashamed. The first card with the snakes is just too funny.

      Liked by 1 person

  • James 15:23 on April 23, 2018 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: A Current Affair, adventure, airport, Aussie, Australia, Bali, boy, , , , clever kids, current affairs, , funny story, G'day mate, genius kid, Indonesia, , , , Nine Network, Perth, plane, police, , psychopath, , , , runaway, Sydney, The Merry Old Land of Aus,   

    A young psychopath? 

    “It was great. Cos I wanted to go on an adventure.” – the kid

    “He just doesn’t like the word no.” – Mum

    Take a look at this story: a 12 year old Australian boy steals his mother’s credit card, cons his grandmother into handing over his passport, then catches a flight from Sydney to Bali, in Indonesia, by himself, lying and charming people all along the way. A psychopath in the making? See what you think:

    The clip, uploaded to YouTube by Screen Tower 2, is from an Australian programme called A Current Affair, broadcast on the Nine Network on 23 April 2018.

     
    • nowve666 16:00 on April 23, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Spunky kid. He certainly had his charm on too. I had a friend who was hitch-hiking in the South at the age of 14. He was busted for truancy. They put him on a chain gang. The bitch of the thing was that when they let him go after he completed his term, the cops came along and busted him all over again. He said they would just act like they had never seen him before. And there were old men who had fallen for this scam. Chuck cut through the woods to escape.

      Like

      • James 13:15 on April 24, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Lol, spunk mean semen in the UK. So “spunky kid”, uhhh…

        Liked by 1 person

    • Critter 16:52 on April 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Very good observation. That kid does not have many behavioral brakes, not to mention a fairly practical way to approach to things. He is pretty much cream of the crop, con man material, lol.

      Liked by 1 person

      • James 21:52 on April 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        What’s a behavioural brake? The thing that cemented it for me was not the kid himself, but the relatives. Dad didn’t even appear, despite being part of the story. Mum deflects blame to “the system” which let her son do what he wants. And granny, when she says that he’s a good kid, is lying. “Ah no, there’s no problem with him. He’s just…” (eyes go up to the right as speech falters) “…too intelligent for himself at the moment.”

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        • Critter 21:20 on April 28, 2018 Permalink | Reply

          If he’s half as intelligent as they give him credit for then surely, he wont have any problem anticipating his parents reaction if he run off with their credit card and passport. He tested their reaction twice before when they picked him up at the airport before, lol. He knows they will be pretty angry, probably stressed out and generally upset for a good while afterwards. None of that seem to bother him and any potential threat of punishment is not a problem either. Judging from the interview it doesn’t seem like he feel guilty or shameful for what he did. In short, he doesn’t seem have much respect for other people.

          He’s good at finding the answers the interviewer will like, even though the guy doesn’t even try to hide his scepticism. The tv host compared him to Frank Abagnale a famous con man, that’s a bit manipulative of him. That’s a bit like suggesting the kid only managed to pull it off because he has the same abilities, not necessearily true, there could be more to that story.

          The relatives come off as a bit shallow, hard to disagree on that. Granny is exaggerating the positive stuff, “he’s kind, he’s generous, he’s got a heart of gold and..Eh..Uhm.. Nah, there is no problem with him. He’s just.. He’s just… Too intelligent for his own self at the moment” she is excusing him and it doesn’t even make sense. She avoids saying anything that can be interpreted as negative. She knows he’s a selfish brat alright.

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          • James 09:56 on May 1, 2018 Permalink | Reply

            I agree with all of that, except I think the reporter and host were both taken in by his charm. Sure, they still saw what he had done, but sometimes that doesn’t matter compared to how someone makes you feel. Of course, there’s always more to the story, that we will never know (it would have been easier for me to make a judgment if I had got a look at the boy’s face, but that’s neither here nor there…)

            Tell me, what do you think of the boy saying that when he watched his parents walking towards him everything slowed down? That struck me as fake as fuck, taken right from some soppy movie (possibly one of the Home Alones!), but then I don’t know whether ‘slow motion’ is actually a thing people experience.

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            • Critter 12:31 on May 2, 2018 Permalink | Reply

              The reporter does seem pretty captivated, he wasn’t hiding that. His face and voice give me the impression that there is an element of conflict between what the knows and what he wants to believe, lol. He looks like he recognise the behavior.

              To me time dilation or slow motion type of experiences is more like something I reccon people would experience in critically dangerous situations (or possibly when certain drugs are involved). For him to experience everything slowing down when his parents show up simply sounds like an incredibly weird reaction. Even wierder when considering all the other stuff he managed to pull off without much restraint. I find that claim difficult to take seriously. It’s like something a drunken sailor would say to flesh out a story, or any teenager to impress his/her friends. He’s mother and granny were exaggerating stuff too, so he probably picked got that habit from home.

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              • James 14:30 on June 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply

                Have you experienced time dilation? I have stepped in front of moving vehicles more times than I should’ve – nothing remotely interesting happened, apart from the people around me getting scared. A couple of times, I said “my life flashed before my eyes”, because I’ve heard others use that one before.

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                • Critter 10:03 on June 22, 2018 Permalink | Reply

                  Can’t say I have experienced anything close to “slow motion”, but time definitively feel like it moves slower if fear is involved. Which can be pretty usefull, for slow people like me, lol.

                  It’s not that I’m the type of person that takes most/everything people say literally, but phrases like “my life flashed before my eyes” kind of sound a bit overly dramatic. Then again some people just have a lot of dramatic stories, which can have entertainment value without having to be 100% believable.

                  Liked by 1 person

    • Critter 11:09 on August 27, 2018 Permalink | Reply

      Have you seen this talk by Frank Abagnale?

      He did most of his crazy stuff when he was in his late teens to early twenties. That guy has a “grifty” intuition like few others. He talks swiftly and fairly highly articulated, what parts of his story do you find believeable and which parts do you think he added because they make people get a better/useful impression of him?

      Just to be clear, I haven’t concluded anything about Frank Abagnales personality.

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      • James 09:03 on August 28, 2018 Permalink | Reply

        Haven’t got time to spend an hour watching that right now, but thanks for sharing. I enjoyed the film adaptation of his life with Leo DiCaprio.

        Like

  • GeneticPsychosMom (Tina) 09:26 on October 20, 2017 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , dark triad, ego, , , , , psychopath, , ,   

    A Narcissist, a Psychopath, and a Machiavellian Walk into a Bar… 

    The bartender asks, ‘who has the darkest personality out of you three?’ The Narcissist says ‘me’, the Psychopath says, ‘I don’t care’ and the Mach says ‘it’s whoever I want it to be’.

    All embarrassing jokes aside, the Dark Triad of Personality rather ominously named, is an area of Psychological research which is attracting significant attention. It is however only a young field, in fact, it was just over a decade ago that Paulhus and Williams (2002) coined the term ‘Dark Triad’. It’s an area of research that seems to intrigue Organisational, Clinical and Forensic Psychologists alike and of course, has important implications for society as a whole. However, is there any real merit, use and/or empirical rigour in the study of these traits? I was inspired to delve a little deeper into the Dark Triad after last month’s blog on office politics, which touched on certain characteristics which fall within the remit of these traits i.e. manipulating others for self gain.

    So what does the Dark Triad consist of?

    Narcissism: characterised by grandiosity, entitlement, dominance, and superiority (Corry, Merritt, Mrug, & Pamp, 2008). The scale largely used to measure this trait is the Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI; Raskin & Hall, 1979).

    Psychopathy: characterised by high levels of impulsivity and thrill-seeking along with low levels of empathy (Hare, 1985). It has been described as the most ‘malevolent’ of the Dark Triad (Rauthmann, 2012). The scale which is largely used in the literature to measure Psychopathy is the Self-Report Psychopathy (SRP) scale, version III forthcoming (Paulhus, Neumann, & Hare). It was modelled on the Psychopathy Check List (Hare, 1991), which is largely seen as the ‘‘gold standard’’ for the measurement of forensic Psychopathy.

    Machiavellianism: characterised as being cynical, unprincipled and using manipulation of others for self-gain and life success (Jones & Palhaus, 2009). The scale which is most used to measure this construct is the Mach IV (Christie & Geis, 1970).

    Global measures of the triad have recently been created such as the Dirty Dozen, a 12 item scale (Jonason & Webster, 2010) and the Short Dark Triad, a 27 item scale (SD3; Jones & Paulhus, forthcoming).

    Both Narcissism and Psychopathy have migrated from the clinical literature as personality disorders found in DSM-IV, whilst Machiavellianism has been distilled from the philosophy and tactics of Nicolo Machiavelli. In this instance, they have been applied to the sub-clinical population in much the same way as the Big Five personality factors. It is suggested that there are extreme personalities in our communities, which cross the boundary over into subclinical Dark Triad territory. In fact, a recent TED talk* highlighted the fact that as many as 1% of ‘normal people’ could be classed as a Psychopath, rising to 4% in CEO’s and business leaders.

    Much of my research into the Dark Triad was precipitated by an excellent new review of the literature by Furnham, Richards & Paulhus (2013). Hence please refer to this for a more detailed account of this area. They do a particularly good job at highlighting the major outcomes which the Dark Triad predict, across the workplace, educational and evolutionary literature.

    Focussing on workplace behaviours, they cite research which shows that while leaders who are high in such traits can be successful in navigating their way to the top (when coupled with high IQ and attractiveness, apparently), most eventually fall or derail in the end (Furnham, 2010). They are described by Hogan (2007) as being able to ‘get ahead’ but not ‘get along’ – which eventually comes back to haunt them. Specific behaviours include Narcissists’ softer methods of manipulation, while Psychopaths use harder, more direct methods and Machs are able to be flexible and switch between both methods (Jonason, Slomski, & Partyka, 2012). With extremely successful publications such as Snakes in Suits raising awareness of Dark Triad traits and behaviours, leadership derailment and management style are more relevant and important than ever.

    In terms of specifics, research indicates that Psychopaths tend to make negative impressions in short meetings (Rauthman, 2012), while Machs have the most questionable morals and are most cynical towards others (Rauthman, 2012). Lastly, Narcissists believe themselves to be good leaders, with high emotional intelligence even though they are perceived negatively by those around them (Petrides et al, 2011). Globally, however, all three Dark Triad traits exhibit a drive for ruthless self-advancement (Zuroff, Fournier, Patall, & Leybman, 2010).

    A word of warning; whereas Psychopaths react aggressively to physical threat, Narcissists do so to ego-threat (Jones & Palhaus, 2010). However, Machs are more deliberate and cautious as to how they react and respond as they don’t give into temptation as easily as the other two typically do (Williams, Nathanson & Paulhus, 2010). Therefore, when thinking about corporate crime, Jones et al (2012) suggest that it is the Mach who is unhindered by the impulsivity of the Psychopath, and displays of hedonism of the Narcissist to be the most successful perpetrator of white-collar crimes.

    All jokes aside, the next time you face an aggressive bully, you could be dealing with a Psychopath. The next time you face an overtly arrogant manager, you could be dealing with a Narcissist. And finally, the next time you find yourself manoeuvred out of an opportunity, you may have just been made a victim of a Mach’s manipulation. The Dark Triad does exist, perhaps in all of us. However, in the vast majority of us, they do so to a much lesser extent than that 1% of the population that they truly manifest themselves in.

    Written by Raj Chopra, TPF committee member.

    Follow me on Twitter: @Raj_Chopra24, follow TPF on Twitter: @TPF_UK.

    References

    Christie, R. C., & Geis, F. L. (1970). Studies in Machiavellianism. New York: Academic press.

    Corry, N., Merritt, R. D., Mrug, S., & Pamp, B. (2008). The factor structure of the Narcissistic Personality Inventory. Journal of Personality Assessment, 90, 593–600.

    Furnham, A. (2010). The Elephant in the Boardroom: The Causes of Leadership Derailment. Basingstoke: Palgrave MacMillan.

    Furnham, A., Richards, S.C. & Paulhus, D.L. (2013) The Dark Triad of Personality: A 10 Year Review. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 7/3, 199–216,

    Hare, R. D. (1985). Comparison of procedures for the assessment of psychopathy. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 53, 7–16.

    Hare, R. D. (1991). The Hare Psychopathy Checklist-Revised. Toronto: Multi-Health Systems.

    Hogan, R. (2007). Personality and the Fate of Organizations. Mahwah, NJ: Erlbaum.

    Jonason, P. K., Slomski, S., & Partyka, J. (2012). The Dark Triad at work: How toxic employees get their way. Personality and Individual Differences, 52, 449–453.

    Jonason, P. K., & Webster, G. D. (2010). The Dirty Dozen: A concise measure of the Dark Triad. Psychological Assessment, 22, 420–432.

    Jones, D. N., & Paulhus, D. L. (2009). Machiavellianism. In M. R. Leary & R. H. Hoyle (Eds.), Handbook of Individual Differences in Social Behavior (pp. 93–108). New York: Guilford.

    Jones, D. N., & Paulhus, D. L. (2010). Different provocations trigger aggression in narcissists and psychopaths. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 1, 12–18.

    Jones, D. N., & Paulhus, D. L. forthcoming. Introducing the Short Dark Triad (SD3): A brief measure of dark personalities. Manuscript under review.

    Paulhus, D. L., Neumann, C. S., & Hare, R. D. forthcoming. Manual for the Self-Report Psychopathy (SRP) Scale. Toronto: Multi-Health Systems.

    Paulhus, D. L, & Williams, K. M. (2002). The Dark Triad of personality: Narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy. Journal of Research in Personality, 36, 556–563.

    Petrides, K. V., Vernon, P. A., Schermer, J. A., & Veselka, L. (2011). Trait emotional intelligence and the Dark Triad of personality. Twin Research and Human Genetics, 14, 35–41.

    Raskin, R. N., & Hall, C. S. (1979). Narcissistic Personality Inventory. Psychological Reports, 45, 590.

    Rauthmann, J. F. (2012). The Dark Triad and interpersonal perception: Similarities and differences in the social consequences of narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 3, 487–496.

    Williams, K. M., Nathanson, C., & Paulhus, D. L. (2010). Identifying and profiling scholastic cheaters: Their personality, cognitive ability, and motivation. Journal of Experimental Psychology: Applied, 16, 293–307.

    Zuroff, D. C., Fournier, M. A., Patall, E. A., & Leybman, M. J. (2010). Steps toward an evolutionary personality psychology: Individual differences in the social rank domain. Canadian Psychology, 51, 58–66.

    Reblogged from: A Narcissist, a Psychopath and a Machiavellian Walk into a Bar…  by Raj Chopra, June 23, 2013

     

    Psychopath TEST Politicians

     

    .

     
    • nowve666 09:47 on October 20, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      I think Machiavellianism is a strategy, not a personality characteristic in itself as if Narcissism and Psychopathy. Both Narcs and ‘Paths can be Machiavellian to achieve their ends. An NT can also use Machiavellian tactics at times. But it’s a technique, not a personality “disorder.” Therefore, I don’t think “the dark triad” should be treated as a “thing.” Three people might have walked into the bar but the third one can be a Narc or a ‘Path or an NT.

      Liked by 2 people

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