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  • James 09:53 on July 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: bad sarcasm, creepy, made you look, , murderer, observant, , , , , , stalker, staring, watching, weakness   

    Psychopath watching you 

    Psychopaths are good at reading people. It’s how they play at being normal. How they get close to you quickly. How they know how to manipulate you. Read on to find out how they do it…

    Well, a little bit anyway. You don’t think I’m just going to blurt out all my secrets to you, do you? For shame, sir or madam, for shame.

    But don’t worry, they all look shifty and dress like prohibition-era spies.

    I’m a starer. Around town, on public transport, in cafés; I’m a regular Emile Zola, without the writing talent of course. I can spend hours people-watching: either listening to conversations and absorbing new ways of talking, new titbits of emotional intelligence and good stories to steal, or by turning my iPod up loud enough to drown out all conversation and focus purely on people’s expressions and body language. This second activity is particularly informative. You’d be surprised at how much you can learn just from the way people hold themselves, how the corner of their mouth is shaped, what their eyes are doing. With very focussed concentration, I can sweep an entire train carriage full of people and pick out the weak and vulnerable – and any probable psychopaths too. Ted Bundy infamously claimed to be able to scan a crowd and find a good victim from the way she walked, and I can totally buy that. I am not in the business of stalking the streets looking for people to rape and kill, but if I were I’d know who to go for.

    So imagine how effective this high-powered observation is when concentrated on just one person: you. That is how your psychopath, if you have one, seems to know you better than you know yourself, while appearing to have the uncanny ability to read your mind. It’s not mind-reading, silly, I just know all of your thoughts! Wait…

    Anyway, all this staring at people I seldom ever interact with sounds incredibly creepy and it probably is. Some people notice me staring and that just motivates me to stare more, just to unnerve. One day, if they ever come across someone who actually wants to murder them, they may sit up and take notice. For me, the staring pays off later when talking to people. Just looking into their face as they talk, and looking them up and down for any additional body language, pay dividends. But it’s not really a conscious process, it’s more an automatic response (whether learnt or instinct I couldn’t say) and I often only reflect on the results afterwards. As with any such skill, you often only notice its benefits when it’s gone; for example, I don’t like it when people wear sunglasses, because they hinder any attempt to look into the person’s eyes. And that’s why you never meet any psychopaths at the beach.

    With this knack for reading people, I often notice traits or underlying emotions a long time before such attributes become more prominent or ‘general knowledge’ within social circles. So for example, when I first moved into university halls of residence, my early impressions turned out more accurate than those of the people who became my friends (How do I know what their first impressions of others were? I asked them of course, stupid). When charming Will turned out to be a boorish twat and everyone was saying “He seemed such a nice guy”, and when quiet Greg was revealed to be psychologically unhinged (“What if he murders us in our sleep?”) I was the only one not surprised. In addition, I picked the two weakest members of the group to be the scapegoats and the butts of all the jokes, and the group accepted this like I knew they would.

    As a preteen, I knew my uncle was a lonely alcoholic just by looking at him (years before his ‘shock’ death). When he died and my mother told me he’d had an addiction, I said “Of course he did, didn’t you know?” She replied that nobody had known and there was nothing anybody could have done to save his life to which I just laughed “You cannot be serious. I knew he was an alcoholic when I was 12. One of you must have thought of getting him help” Of course this upset her, and though she quickly chalked what I’d said up to grief it was nothing of the sort; I was genuinely incredulous that nobody else had seen what I had. Not wishing to appear weird, these days I pretend to be surprised when somebody reveals something like that about themselves e.g. they have got an anxiety disorder. “Well, no shit!” I want to say, but I don’t.

    “Oh my god! YOU have confidence issues?! I never knew!”

    The flip side to this is that when someone says something about themselves that I didn’t already know, it’s a novel surprise, one which I really appreciate. Think you can surprise me? Leave a comment below, that should do it.

    Images courtesy of the Internet.

     
    • Human 11:16 on July 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Thanks for yet another excellent article! What is your reaction or strategy when you spot a pathological peer?

      Liked by 1 person

      • James 15:50 on July 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        You’re most welcome. I wouldn’t write if I didn’t think I was reaching anybody, so thank you for reading.

        Regarding your question, I don’t want to say too much as I think that is an excellent idea for an article, but let’s just say that, going by the list set out in How a psychopath views you *, they come under the category of ‘threat’.

        *https://nopsychos.wordpress.com/2015/04/30/how-a-psychopath-views-you/

        Liked by 2 people

    • luverley 22:00 on July 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I can spot them a mile away these days

      Like

    • luverley 22:04 on July 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Haha I commented even before reading the blog. Loved it as I totally relate.

      Like

      • James 23:12 on July 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        What do you relate to, Lovely?

        Liked by 1 person

        • luverley 00:01 on July 20, 2015 Permalink | Reply

          Being a psychopath. Checking out people by their actions and everything you described. Learnt to. Had to over the years. Scan for psychos lol.

          Like

          • James 05:58 on July 20, 2015 Permalink | Reply

            But you’re not a psychopath, so how do you relate to that?

            Like

            • luverley 06:24 on July 20, 2015 Permalink | Reply

              Hahahahaha but i have the mind and the skill that i could very well choose to be if i wanted to take over the body and rule like i used to. We all use our people watching skills for different things in this body. Had to learn to watch body language from a very young age. Scout out the predators

              Like

    • Terrie 11:57 on July 20, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      James, Thanks for the eye opener.
      What’s your opinion on dating sites and psycho’s?
      T

      Like

      • James 14:18 on July 20, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        Hi, Terrie. My opinion is that psychopaths can and do use dating sites, but that anybody who uses such sites should be careful regardless of psychopathy. Hopefully you’d agree that psychopaths have just as much right as anyone else to use online dating, but with that must come greater vigilance and personal responsibility for your own safety.

        Liked by 2 people

    • Amaterasu Solar 15:01 on July 20, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      This and responses leaves Me pondering many things. I know well what it is like to be watched. It used to bother Me, but now I get a sort of amusement from it. Thank You again, James, for insight.

      I ponder why reaching People is important to You.

      I ponder a lack of joy relative to not being a psychopath. And I ponder the idea that One should ever consider Oneself NOT responsible for One’s own safety. The controlmind (government) will enslave Those who think They should not be so responsible. The most psychopathic get off on ruling a planet, wiping out Others because They can.

      There’s a few more things but those stood out the most. Thanks again for Your words, James. [smile]

      Liked by 1 person

      • James 15:18 on July 20, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        Well hey there, Amy. Pleasure to hear from you again 🙂

        Responsibility, ha. Just like Winnie the Pooh, you can ponder to your heart’s content on the rest of those conjectures, but one of the main lessons I am trying to impart to my brilliant readers is one of personal responsibility. You can never be victimised by a psychopath – or anyone else for that matter – if you have your brain in gear and recognise that you and you alone are responsible for your well-being.

        Please tell me what you mean, “a lack of joy relative to not being a psychopath.”

        Liked by 2 people

        • Amaterasu Solar 16:42 on July 20, 2015 Permalink | Reply

          That was in re Your discussion with luverley. I ponder the perspective seeing no joy without slipping into psychopath… Or perhaps I misread luverley’s reply?

          You and I agree on the responsibility thing. It’s one reason I work for a society that is based on that, and not one that requires abdication of that to a system (all One accomplishes is making Oneself vulnerable). Such systems always promote psychopaths.

          Like

          • James 17:46 on July 20, 2015 Permalink | Reply

            There’s not much ambiguity in “exactly” as a reply.
            Feeling out of control for various reasons I won’t share makes Luverley wish for a state of much greater self-mastery and rational detachment from her misery.

            Many psychopaths would prefer to have no ‘system’ at all, for reasons that should be clear. It’s these ones you really ought to worry about. Your attempts to rid society of psychopathy (as a behavioural pattern) by changing the society itself may be admirable but they’re doomed to failure.

            Liked by 1 person

            • Amaterasu Solar 11:30 on July 21, 2015 Permalink | Reply

              I disagree, because I do NOT try to “rid society of psychopathy.” I remove the paths to power over Others in all ways except charisma – and that will take One only so far. By stripping the accounting for Our energy (money) from the way We do things, psychopaths have no way to pay toadies, to bribe, set up blackmail scenarios, and threaten (and kill) Others.

              They are not eliminated. They (as do We all) just become personally responsible for any poor behavior They choose. No more corporations to hide behind. No more manipulation on any large scale.

              Maybe not utopia (there will still be problems to solve) but surely a whole hell of a lot better, with the empathic majority allowing BEST solutions to emerge, not profit/power motivated choices imposed on Us.

              Like

              • James 12:51 on July 21, 2015 Permalink | Reply

                But what you’re trying to do is take the psychopathy (which you equate with monetary and power systems) out of society. Sure, that doesn’t involve eliminating the psychopaths themselves but, as you claim here, it removes nearly all of the ways in which they hurt people.

                What I’m contesting is that is not the case, you may have cut out the power elite, but you’re forgetting all those ordinary psychopaths out there (95% +) who will be affected by the revolution only as much as anyone else, and will continue living their lives as they see fit.

                And that’s not even thinking of those who would absolutely take advantage of the (maybe just temporary, but still catastrophic) chaos that would ensue following the collapse of the state and the economy to do exactly as they please with no consequences for the very first time. I know I would. The society you have built protects you from us, and once you break that society you break the chains holding us back. Quoting Nelson Muntz (The Simpsons), because I sadly couldn’t find a clip, “The second you untie me, I’m gonna beat you to death, man.”

                Like

                • Amaterasu Solar 23:47 on July 21, 2015 Permalink | Reply

                  Not exactly. Money/power systems PROMOTE Them to power – they’re not equivalent. I am trying to take Them out of power, yes.

                  And no, I did not forget. I just know that defrauding and taking Others’ stuff will have FAR less motive – even for psychopaths. Why take Others’ stuff when You can get it for free? HOW would defraud work without money. Maybe in interpersonal issues, but I have never claimed to solve for interpersonal issues.

                  And there is no need for pandemonium (chaos has infolded structure that emerges). It may be that the psychopaths will collapse things before free energy is released, but not much I can do about that. If We have free energy and awareness of the goals, the whole transition could be painless and done within a decade.

                  I do expect, if the psychopaths bring things down before I succeed, that pandemonium will ensue and the psychopaths will choose poor behavior. I hope to avoid that.

                  Like

    • air conditioning services 15:00 on August 17, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Well it’s all up to the parents, on where they take their children and such.

      Like

    • prettyvacantx 18:36 on December 7, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      The whole aspect of such intense eye contact gives me shivers just reading about it

      Liked by 1 person

      • James 09:40 on December 8, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        Good. I aim to creep you out, if nothing else.

        Liked by 2 people

        • prettyvacantx 14:28 on December 8, 2015 Permalink | Reply

          You intrigue me more than anything else! But creepy and unsettling comes in a close second! 😉

          Liked by 2 people

          • James 06:29 on December 9, 2015 Permalink | Reply

            How kind!

            Liked by 1 person

            • @GeneticPsycho (Tina) 10:02 on December 9, 2015 Permalink | Reply

              James, were you being facetious, or do you like people to think you’re creepy? And this brings up a great conversation about how much do words “hurt” you?

              Liked by 1 person

              • James 20:14 on December 9, 2015 Permalink | Reply

                I was indeed being facetious. In everyday situations I aim to be as uncreepy as possible.

                Did prettyvacantx mean to hurt me with her words? If she did, it flew over my head, but I still don’t detect any malice even now. I think she’s above such things.

                Liked by 1 person

                • prettyvacantx 17:03 on December 10, 2015 Permalink | Reply

                  I wasn’t trying to hurt anyone, I am sorry if it came across that way! I don’t have any malicious intentions, just genuine interest (and fact searching for an essay I’m writing!)

                  Liked by 1 person

                  • James 07:29 on December 11, 2015 Permalink | Reply

                    It didn’t come across that way to me. No apologies necessary. What essay are you writing, may I enquire?

                    Like

                    • prettyvacantx 08:02 on December 11, 2015 Permalink | Reply

                      A research paper on a topic of interest within the field of psychology & criminology. I decided to do it on psychopathy, with particular focus on behavior analysis and the minds of psychopaths 🙂 None of this would count as an official source but it helps with context.

                      Liked by 1 person

                      • James 12:48 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Sounds fascinating. If there’s any further way I can help, you only have to ask. What level of study are you at? I’m an undergraduate.

                        Liked by 1 person

                      • prettyvacantx 13:26 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        It would be great to ask you questions! I’m still in college (or what you university in England, I believe?) so I haven’t gotten my degree yet unfortunately. What did you major in?

                        Like

                      • James 17:04 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Undergraduate means I haven’t graduated yet either 🙂 Yes I’m at university, studying Philosophy, perhaps not what you were expecting…

                        Liked by 1 person

                      • prettyvacantx 17:37 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Not what I was expecting at all lol. Out of curiosity, what on earth drove you to choose Philosophy? 🙂

                        Like

                      • James 17:43 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Because it’s the coolest subject, of course.

                        Like

                      • prettyvacantx 17:51 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Pfff I beg to differ. Psychology could make Philosophy its bitch. :))

                        Liked by 1 person

                      • James 18:21 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Utter bollocks. Philosophy is the oldest academic discipline. There is philosophical study of every other discipline, including psychology, and I have to say that it doesn’t look good for you guys 🙂

                        Like

                      • prettyvacantx 19:00 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        What doesn’t look good for us?

                        Like

                      • James 19:07 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Basically, your discipline is a load of horseshit, lol 🙂

                        Liked by 1 person

                      • prettyvacantx 19:10 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Lol. Absolutely not, how exactly is it horseshit?

                        Like

                      • James 19:11 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Anyway, are you going to ask your questions, or just try to start an inter-subject war?

                        Like

                      • prettyvacantx 19:13 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Well damn, I was going to ask questions but then you had to get me all riled up by calling psychology horseshit lol

                        Like

                      • James 19:15 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        You started it.
                        If you’re that easily manipulated, maybe you’re in the wrong discipline.

                        Can we continue?

                        Liked by 1 person

                      • prettyvacantx 19:20 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        You started it and I am not easily manipulated at all. Do you have any form of private messaging because commenting is strenuous :))

                        Like

                      • James 19:25 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        “Pfff I beg to differ. Psychology could make Philosophy its bitch. :))”

                        You calling me a liar?

                        Oliver Butler (obutler2609@outlook.com) is who I pretend to be sometimes. You can message me there, if you wish.

                        Liked by 1 person

                      • prettyvacantx 19:29 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        That was a joke, not an attack man! And okay, thank you “Oliver”. :))

                        Like

                      • James 19:30 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        In future, you might want to not bother making jokes. They’re not your forté.

                        Liked by 1 person

                      • prettyvacantx 19:36 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        In future you might not want to judge me on one offhand joke made on the internet. I can produce quality humor when I want to, Oliver.

                        Like

                      • James 19:38 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        OK, look forward to laughing long and hard.

                        Like

                      • prettyvacantx 19:41 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Don’t condescend me, Oliver.

                        Like

                      • James 19:44 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Why not?

                        Like

                      • James 19:45 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Prove to me you’re worth respecting, if not get off my blog.

                        Liked by 1 person

                      • prettyvacantx 19:48 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        How am I supposed to do that then?

                        Like

                      • prettyvacantx 19:53 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        I wasn’t even being disrespectful, I was just being sarcastic, stop getting in my head and getting me all confused.

                        Like

                      • James 20:00 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Oh sorry 😦 You can email me if you want, I’m heading to bed. I won’t be around tomorrow much, so don’t fret if I don’t reply immediately.

                        Like

                      • prettyvacantx 20:09 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Okay, sweet dreams Oliver 🙂

                        Like

                      • James 20:10 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        Merci, bonne nuit, chérie 🙂

                        Liked by 1 person

                      • prettyvacantx 14:10 on December 11, 2015 Permalink

                        what you call *

                        Like

    • prettyvacantx 08:58 on December 9, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Not that you care, eh?

      Liked by 1 person

    • nowve666 13:24 on December 25, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      James, you are majoring in philosophy? I thought it was French. Philosophy is an awesome discipline. I especially love Epistemology. Psychology seems an attempt at group think to me. Years ago, everyone was diagnosed as Schizophrenic. Now Personality Disorders are the rave. In Philosophy you have different schools of thought and each has it’s adherents. In Psychology, everyone has to embrace the one “true” idea. That’s actually a weakness of science, not just Psychology. But the “hard sciences” have a much stronger ability to find an objective truth that is lacking in the “soft sciences.” Sam Vaknin suggested psychologists could do better if they looked at their discipline more as philosophy than science.

      Liked by 1 person

      • James 18:22 on December 25, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        Sam Vaknin is full of shit. You’re right though, about everything.

        Like

  • James 08:22 on June 20, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , , , , , , weakness   

    Infiltration by Psychopath 

    How does a psychopath ingratiate himself into your life? Read on to find out…

    Psychopath and Victim pic

    This is not what my life looks like right now, but it might resemble yours if you’ve let a psychopath in. Nice legs, don’t you think?

    It’s been a while since I wrote anything for this blog, so let me fill you in on a couple of things that have happened since my last contribution. Due to my work contract coming to an end, I am now unemployed and economically inactive until I resume my university studies in September. With a much reduced income, I had no choice but to vacate my city centre apartment and find alternative digs.

    Perhaps surprisingly for anyone who thinks psychopaths live only for the present and act entirely on impulse (this is not an entirely untrue picture, just an incomplete one), I had been well aware of when I would be jobless and had planned ahead accordingly. You see, I’ve been making friends and sussing out opportunities all year. Failing that, I had the telephone number of the local hippie commune which could have proved a rich hunting ground. But I have academic work to do, I needed somewhere quiet and stable to get on with it.

    Enter Elise.

    Elise is a primary school teacher. She works in the CLIS department (CLasse pour l’Inclusion Scolaire) – students with special needs, in effect. And she has a young daughter, Ludivine, whom she loves very much. In other words, she’s a kind-hearted pro-social woman who is used to putting others before herself. She is also lonely; her husband of ten years recently left her and her 4 year-old daughter, and in the past two years she has lost a mother and two grandparents to death’s clammy grip. On top of that she has an interest in languages and other cultures. Can you see where this going?

    I now live in Elise’s brand new house in a quiet suburb entirely rent free, in exchange for a couple of hours of childcare a week for her daughter and a willingness to speak English – and otherwise fill a void – around the house.

    If it sounds like I’m boasting that’s because I am, a little. But this also gives you an insight of how easy it is to let a stranger – a psychopath no less – into your life, into your home, with access to your child.* I don’t think Elise really stopped to consider the speed at which I became involved with her. If there’s any lesson I am imparting to you is think things through.

    Having said that, I have been thus far no trouble at all to Elise. I have cooked meals, helped around the house (admittedly not as much as I promised to but she doesn’t seem to mind), taught Ludivine to count to ten, have English conversations whenever asked to and have kept to the all-important childcare. Being the caring, perceptive, understanding friend that I am, I have learned several of Elise’s secrets, her inner psychological worries and the like, and they are handy for manipulation purposes but if all goes to plan I won’t get around to seriously using them. Remember, this is my quiet place to get on with work – no time for drama. When I’m done, I’ll leave, and the family will be in a better, not worse, situation than when I arrived.

    I guess there are two takeaway messages from this. One is what we have already touched on. Think critically. Ask yourself who you are sharing your life with and why. E.g. don’t just assume a charming foreign student is everything he seems to be and give him the keys to your house and a position of responsibility over your child. I’ve always liked the custom associated to the vampire myth that you have to implicitly invite the vampire in before he can access your home, and the same is true of psychopaths. You’re responsible for who you make part of your life.

    But on a more positive note, my other message of the day. Just because someone is a psychopath it is not inevitable that death, destruction and heartbreak will follow. The fact is I am temporarily living the perfect suburban life; I have been domesticated. I even let the cat sleep on my bed.

    ‘Course, if it all goes tits up, there’s always the ultimate fall back…

    No disrespecting the parents

    *I say that like it’s a threat, and with someone else with different intentions it could be, but not me. I am competent and easy-going as a babysitter. I am not a disciplinarian but neither am I a pushover. Example, today Ludivine said “we’re going to stop at the park on the way home” to which I responded “Oh? Was that a question or a demand?” which elicited an apology and an admirably glib reformulation of her sentence into a polite request. I find the child vaguely boring, occasionally I have fun with her, but most of the time I’m stifling a yawn and pretending to be delighted with whatever tedious crap she’s doing. 

    All names have been changed, because that’s what professional journalists do in articles like this. 

     
  • GeneticPsychosMom (Tina) 11:03 on June 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , weakness   

    Psychopaths are Parasites; Feeding on Your Yummy Goodness 

    Psychopaths choose victims because that person has something of value. Psychopaths are driven by their desire to make things as easy as possible for themselves, regardless of the resulting ruination of others. The easiest mode of survival is to take a ride on the back of someone who is their antithesis. The opposite of psychopathy is selflessness. The most magnanimous souls are the ones who have suffered pain and grief; so do everything in their power to keep others from agony.

    James suggested that my previous “relationships” with predators was because I had “weak and damaged” written all over me. In his blog post, “Are you my next target?“, James queried, ” More importantly, what weaknesses do you have that a psychopath could potentially exploit?”

    Since I want to keep others from being in pain, that does not make me weak, it makes me strong. I had survived neglect and physical abuse in childhood, so that left scars that supposedly a psychopath can sniff out as weakness.  NOT SO. What the psychopath is sniffing out is my high tolerance for other humans and my acceptance of the many flaws that come with humanity. The lumps that I carried into adulthood provide me with a perspective and a strength, so that I would never do unto others the same harm that was done to me.

    This means that the psychopaths are the weak ones, because they need to prey on people who love easy, and are full of sweetness and tolerance and goodness. We were victims because we give the benefit of the doubt. These are valuable qualities to be sustained in the human animal.

    Being complaisant is not something to be ashamed of, nor something to be changed because it might be exploited by psychopaths. What needs changing is increasing our awareness of the parasitic worms who would latch on to our succulence, and then distort reality, tricking us into thinking that our delicious essence should be snuffed out to their own low level.

    What this boils down to is that psychopaths are not looking for weak people. Instead, they are looking for people who can carry their shifty weight. So, do not heed the barbaric precepts of psychopathic philosophy: Psychopaths unjustifiably despise self-sacrificing people, the very best people on earth.

    The question that needs asking is not “what weakness do you have?”  The question we need to ask is, “Do you know how to identify the psychopaths?”

     

    Psychopath TEST Politicians

     
    • bettykrachey 15:13 on June 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Reblogged this on Falsely Accused.

      Like

    • James 16:37 on June 19, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Good response, Tina. You’re very right that not all ‘weaknesses’ are something to be ashamed of. Being selfless, caring etc is not an inherently bad thing, but they are things which can be exploited if you allow them. Hence they are weaknesses in the eyes of a predator. I had intended to make that clear at the time, with the wolf analogy, but looking back it doesn’t read like that at all. Oopsie.

      Liked by 1 person

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