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  • James 10:48 on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ahoy shipmates, comment bait, , , , Horalky, , nech žije král' Johann, , neurotypicals, opinion, pity, prejudice, , , , Tatra,   

    What’s your opinion on psychopaths? 

    I recently asked a (neurotypical) friend of mine, Johann, who lives in Slovakia, the following question:

    “I wonder, how do you personally feel about the fact that psychopaths exist? And what emotions do you feel toward them, as a group. Pity? Admiration? Indifference? Or something else?”

    His reply is sensible, measured, and – I would argue – reveals a healthy attitude of tolerance we could all* benefit from emulating.

    I don’t hold grudges against any one (though I can’t stand people who hurt and torture children) so I take them as other people. They just exist and there is nothing to be done about it. My friend and you are good examples of how they can fit in our society. Although somebody once said that it’s your thought that matters and not the action, I must disagree. Actions matter most. I can even understand why you need to lie and manipulate so much. It’s probably your way of survival and getting along with people (I would never have befriended my friend if he’d told me he was a psychopath, because of fear and not because of prejudice).

    As for the ones who purposely hurt other people, well, one doesn’t have to be a psychopath to hurt others. I’ve read that all serial killers are psychopaths, but I don’t think so. There are a lot of lunatic people who actually empathise with others yet they enjoy hurting them. The most dangerous ones are those who feel pain and hatred in their hearts and seek revenge for something.

    Slovenska or Slovenija? I guess it doesn’t matter. Just don’t mention Hungary.

    I may feel a little pity, because you’ll never be able to experience genuine love. I admire a lot of people, so some may be psychopaths. I feel indifference to cruel people only. Knowing that yu exist, I try to be more careful with people, because I don’t want to end up as their target.

    I hadn’t even thought about psychopaths before my friend told me.

    The friend Johann refers to is somebody he lived with in Bratislava until recently, who ‘came out’ as a psychopath to Johann after being confronted over something naughty he’d done. This in itself is an unusual course of action.

    And now, if any of you really care, here’s what I wrote in response:

    For sure actions matter more than thoughts, because they are what actually have an effect on the world. But I do think people get a bit freaked out that psychopaths even exist, for what they are more than for what they do. I could be sympathetic to someone who said “I think psychopaths are evil because they hurt people”. I don’t happen to agree that is true, but it’s a valid enough claim. But hating psychopaths just for existing is prejudice. A form of speciesism, if those morons are right about us not being human!

    Yes I have to lie and manipulate to survive, but you’d be mistaken if you thought I didn’t enjoy it. I love messing with people.

    Ah yes, “love”. Genuinely mystified by everyone’s obsession with love, but I suppose that only serves to prove your point. But if it makes me sound any better, I am also baffled by hatred. I’ve never felt hate for any individual or group in all my life.

    “I hadn’t even thought about psychopaths before my friend told me.” A think a big part of our success is people’s ignorance. They don’t know we exist, or if they do they think we’re (i) quite rare or (ii) all serial killers.

    Personally, I think it’s amazing that psychopaths have – probably – been around for all of human history, yet their existence was only first ‘discovered’ less than one hundred years ago. Like penicillin. Or radioactivity.

    Tatra Mountains, Europe, Beautifulo autumn sightview

    I promise I’m not sponsored by ‘Visit Slovakia’, but just look at this gorgeous landscape.

    Do you agree with Johann? If not, how would you respond to my question? Are you one of those who believe a lack of conscience is inherently evil regardless of how an individual behaves? I would love to hear from you in the comments section below. Be as rude as you like.

    Thanks very much, Johann, both for your brilliant answer and for agreeing to let me publish some of our conversation. You’re the best. 

    *Obviously I don’t need to learn to be more tolerant of psychopaths. But I could certainly improve my attitude to neurotypicals.

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    • Amaterasu Solar 21:55 on July 27, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      There was a glitch in the system & I was unable to see a reply section on this page. So I made a blog post in response – this is what I said:

      I was moved to respond to James’ article, What’s your opinion on psychopaths?, but it seems that is the only page I do not get a reply box or even see replies on.

      What I wanted to add is that I don’t have an opinion of psychopaths, per se, but that I judge ALL, Each by whether They choose to remain Ethical. If They don’t break the three Laws of Ethics (also called Common Law), it’s not My business to impose, and if They are pleasant, I tend to like them a lot.

      In fact, I suggest this would be the approach statistically all of Us would choose in the abundance paradigm. [smile]

      Like

      • James 06:38 on July 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        I’m not sure why you were prevented from writing a comment, that’s odd.

        Like

        • Amaterasu Solar 08:51 on July 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

          Seems it was just a glitch. Tina fixed it for Me. [smile]

          Like

          • James 09:42 on July 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

            You shouldn’t be bothering Tina, she’s got a lot to do at the moment!

            Like

            • Amaterasu Solar 11:30 on July 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

              Actually, I mentioned to a friend on twitter that had commented to both of Us, and so Tina saw My reply. She took care of the problem [smile]

              Liked by 1 person

              • James 11:47 on July 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply

                Isn’t she a wonderful human being? 🙂

                Please, see my post on ‘Ethics’ (I’ve forgotten the name of my own article…)

                Liked by 1 person

    • Frances Nowve 03:20 on July 31, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      I am somewhat confused. So you ARE a psychopath. Since you wrote this under a heading “No Psychos, No Druggies, No Stooges” that you were AGAINST us. Well, in spite of that strange heading, I’m glad you are not. As a psychopath, myself, I think we are great. More interesting than most people. I am damned tired of people ragging on us, calling us “evil” and inhuman. I liked your friend’s response. Very even handed as you said. I liked what you said at the end about neurotypicals.

      Like

      • James 07:04 on July 31, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        That’s just cognitive dissonance you’re feeling.

        Neurotypicals are typically boring and irrational people, so it will take all of my willpower to improve my attitude.

        Like

      • James 07:17 on July 31, 2015 Permalink | Reply

        Also, I see you’re an advocate for Slytherins. Now that’s an unfairly maligned group if ever there was one. They’re not even all psychopaths, just intelligent strategic people, and they’re constantly treated like the villains.

        Liked by 1 person

    • Frances Nowve 16:59 on July 31, 2015 Permalink | Reply

      Thanks, James. I would click “like” but I’m having password issues. How not unusual. 😉

      Like

    • Paola 08:59 on April 23, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      “Coming out” is the term that is truest. One last drama/trauma night and there he was. It’s been a year now. The shock has wore off. Reality has come home to stay. Ignorance is bliss is no longer an option. In the end I don’t know what or how to feel for or about him , “the stranger” in our faux relationship”. I accept that I was genuine and honest. In the end it’s all that matters. This chapter ended. Life goes on…

      Like

    • andrew 10:12 on November 2, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Being called a psychopath is a form of moral judgement. It is not based on anything the person has, only what the society thinks he is. When you really think about it, it’s a label by a bunch of conformists for a person who does not conform. As a consequence, I can not accept the existence of this label.
      I grew around people, yet I was vastly different. I have my own personal code of ethics. And I have extremely high standards. Unfortunately, most dont try and fall very very short. It would make me mad when I had tondeal with others and see betrayal and lies and plain stupidity. I got told “to err is to human” and I would say, “if that is the case, then it sucks to be human”

      One day, someone studied me for a lengthy time, testing me without my knowledge, finally told me I was a psychopath. Then I had to dig this up and I have to disagree with a lot of that bunk.. Here’s why:

      She was hard working, extremely emotional and got upset by little things to a point where she could barely function. I am not ruffled no matter what happens. I prepare to pick up the pieces after the hurricane, as someone is bound to do, and it might as well be me as the next person. Things never work perfectlly, so one should always be proactive and a bit detached, while also working xooperatively with others.
      All human beings practise manipulation, its just that some have worked that into an art form of unparalled skill.
      Those who try to complqin about psychopaths are hypocrites who are looking to create a new group of people to hunt down as witches. What you think, is your own concern, what you do houkd be rewarded or punished. The basis of law, government, and human endevour is based on actions, not thoughts.
      What I am basically saying, is that the study of Psychopathy is an insidious trap that all people of unencumbered mind have to avoid. DO NOT FALL INTO THAT TRAP.
      It is a trap laid by the weak, to fetter the strong. You are not responsible for another person’s condition. Empaths, as they call themselves claim tonfeel another’s pain, but what exactly are they doing with theor life?
      Those who think they are psychopaths need to avoid blogs like a plague and study human history, and in doing so, you will find you have a place in it, a better place than 99.5% give you, an animal dressed like a human to be hunted down and shunned.

      Like

      • @GeneticPsycho (Tina) 11:45 on November 2, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        Hi Andrew, thanks for sharing. Since the label psychopath has a bad reputation, what do you want to be called?

        Like

      • James 18:26 on November 2, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        I am inclined to agree with most of everything you wrote, Andrew. Other than checking in on comments occasionally (yours is an illuminating one), I’ve pretty much abandoned this blog, and through losing the desire to write about psychopathy, I’ve also moved a long way from thinking of myself as a psychopath, or as an anything. After a frankly miserable few years of consciously embodying psychopathy, I’m just going to be me, and fuck all labels, because none of them fit.

        Like

    • andrew 14:09 on November 29, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I don’t know what you should call them. But I know psychopath is not a good term to use. They lump all the corrupt politicians, serial killers, and all the misguided but powerful people being rebelled against,’psychopath”.
      And that’s ridiculous to the highest degree. The psychopath label comes with a lot of problems. I need not repeat them. A lot of sensationalism, no doubt pushed by the media, has pushed the narratives about psychopathy in the general population. The criminals, wishing a piece of fame, closet paranoids though they are, rejoice in committing crime, the grislier the better, for a slice of fame. And the public turns around and points, “a psychopath”.
      So the issue here is not that psychopathy has come out in the open at all, no. It is that the society has changed. The rules that worked in defining human behaviour no longer work, and the psychologists are trying very hard, unsuccessfully, to blame some people for their failures. The people who CAN commit crimes without feeling sorry for them. Operative word is CAN.
      After the study by Robert Hare, the cat is out of the bag. I have read enough history to predict the behaviour of groups of people, and the witch hunts will cone one day.
      Gone will be Innocent till proven guilty. Gone will be trial by incidental facts alone. The assumed fact of being a psychopath will be enough to get those who don’t pass the ball put away. This is the game, those who pass the Psychopathy buck are playing.
      We have , at this time, almost universal betrayal of populations by their elected officials, commerce controlled by those who can pay for the privilege to get the chance to deny the rest either opportunity or the fruit of their labor, we have drugs ravaging most neighborhoods, and i doubt most are certain they could keep their jobs if they dared to do what was right, rather than “follow the rules”.
      I pointed out very big, systematic problems, and we have not even started discussing the horrific school system.
      But apparently, that guy who lives next to you, that you might work with, who wants to succeed and wants nothing to do with you unless his life demands it, poses more problems to you than the systemic problems you face daily and you don’t even bother to do something to help yourself.
      For those who think they are psychopaths, think hard. There are consequences for others like you. If you are not a misguided person messing it up wholesale for others, don’t identify with those who do.

      For the NTs, at.the end of the day, we are people. We have laws. We have various systems we use. We have science. Being a victim does not make the other person evil. It does make you weak. You must assume responsibility for your behaviour, good or bad.

      It is time to put this label away. It is a label that misinforms, and which has created a lot of misunderstanding.

      Like

      • @GeneticPsycho (Tina) 15:21 on November 29, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        You think: “Being a victim does not make the other person evil. It does make you weak. You must assume responsibility for your behaviour, good or bad.”

        Anybody could be a victim, even you. Victims may be unaware, but they aren’t weak, and can’t “assume responsibility” for the antisocial behavior of the victimizer. The victimizer has ALL of the responsibility for forcing their own agenda on other people.

        Liked by 1 person

        • Amaterasu Solar 15:27 on November 29, 2016 Permalink | Reply

          Yeah, Tina. Victim-blaming. “I chose to screw You over. It’s YOUR fault what I chose to do because YOU’RE weak!” Pffft. The One who chooses the unEthical behavior is responsible.

          Liked by 1 person

    • andrew 12:55 on November 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      And you have a responsibility for your own existence. Never ever forget that, at the end of the day, your existence is your own responsibility, so choose wisely. Don’t take the wrong viewpoint on this, which is, you are getting blamed. The viewpoint is you must toughen up so you are not taken advantage of so you become a more effective person overall. A victim is someone in a condition of weakness. While victims should be protected, being a victim is not an ideal state of existence, being an effective person, is.

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      • @GeneticPsycho (Tina) 21:03 on November 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        People don’t need to “toughen up”. They need only learn. The only reason you feel superior to others is because you were taught some things before other people got the chance to learn it. You weren’t born with knowledge, yet you expect others to be on the same page? Being the first to learn something may put you in a better position in the game, but that doesn’t mean a weakness of the other players.

        Liked by 1 person

    • andrew 07:51 on December 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      You are weird. You are too busy trying to get into other people’s heads to really think for yourself. Where is this superiority crap coming from? Is it possible that your feelings already got involved and have already interfered with your ability to think? This is the proof you need to dump the psychopath label. Someone is seriously confused, and it sure isn’t the guy labeled a psychopath. But being right doesn’t guarantee success, being intelligent and capable does.
      The supposed psychopathic traits are subjective labels by people who are overwhelmed ny their feelings. Embracing their label means you give up your individuality, freedom, free viewpoint, in exchange for what?

      In exchange for being a pariah and being branded a monster and losing any benefits you have with no objective reason? Where is the empathic understanding here? I, for one, are not holding my breath. How can you do any thinking when your feelings are involved? What makes one human, the ability to think or the ability to feel? The good thing, is the real beast is out in the open. The real beast is people are giving up their ability to think, and embracing the ability to feel.
      This has nothing to do with stopping crime, indeed, it never did. It is a kind of manipulation whose goal is to force people into a collective mindset through manipulation. To stop crimes and all the problems we have to do, all you have to do is enforce the law and be unreasonable with criminal activities of any kind. This psychopath crap creates more problems than it solves.

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      • @GeneticPsycho (Tina) 20:34 on December 1, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        You said, “You are weird. You are too busy trying to get into other people’s heads to really think for yourself.”

        Everything you say indicates that you think you are superior. Then you contradict yourself quite often. First, you try to lambast me: ” Is it possible that your feelings already got involved and have already interfered with your ability to think…”

        AND THEN you complain, ” Where is the empathic understanding here?”

        Make up your mind.

        Liked by 1 person

    • andrew 07:58 on December 2, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Your opinions and your feelings are so damn important, so you think. You think I really care about your opinion and the truth is I care only so much as it has communication value, and that’s as far as it goes. As far as the inferiority complex, who cares what you think? If one could even call this, thinking. It’s difficult to be personal to do someone who has no “person” about them

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      • @GeneticPsycho (Tina) 09:43 on December 2, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        You are really going off the track. Yes, my opinions and my feelings are really damn important. Aren’t everybody’s?

        I don’t expect you to care. You are a psychopath, and by definition, you have a brain condition preventing you from caring about people. So, let’s go back to discussing why you’re here – to defend psychopaths from empaths. You actually made good points about societal flaws.

        People are generally controlled by their emotions – however, we can learn to put them aside with practice. Empaths have the ability to expand our views to see it from the other side. Psychopaths cannot learn to use emotion, and have completely one-sided viewpoints.

        I was made to be emotional and caring. I wouldn’t have it any other way. So, although I can see your side, and I wouldn’t like to live it.

        When you commented on this blog under the name of “Jul”, you wrote: “Only a stupid one would own up to being a psychopath. They are indeed not good people at all. Without a lot of internal effort, they can wreak havoc. One of these can make a terrible parent or a life partner. But there is a caveat….if you mishandle them. And Lucy, that’s how you messed up. You did not know the creature you married.”

        Well, you have been “branded a monster” by yourself. Where do we empaths go from here?

        Liked by 1 person

    • andrew 16:23 on December 2, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      You are as objective as they come, I observe rather sarcastically. The comments I wrote are meant to warn those who might not see the trap of being dumb enough to look at themselves through the eyes of such “an enlightened being” as yourself. My point is “enlightened beings” like yourself are setting the rules on who and what to do with a group of people you have decided you dont like. The only side that gets heard, is the empaths, the “harmed”, the “good”, the “sheep”, the angels, the “victims”.

      I don’t care for your crappy sense of ethics, or your sense of justice, or your sense of perception, because, truth be told, you can’t see past your face, and your feelings, and beyond your pathetic life. But that does not mean if you have enough dumb people, you can’t make life for others, because you can.

      Look at earth today, and all the misery you see around you, is not due to psychopaths, but due to evil people(being evil and a psychopath are not inclusive), and what can be called collective stupidity.

      Well, Tina, thanks for saying something. I got what you said, seriously, I did. Unfortunately, it doesn’t apply to the here and now so I’ve lost interest. My intention was to warn others of dangers looming in the background, and that, I have done in a few posts.

      The warning is: don’t identify with the psychopath label because it is a sure way to ruin your social life. Don’t identify with any of the criteria as they were done by NTs who had an axe to grind against someone. In any case, there is nothing flattering at all bout those traits. And lastly, there is absolutely no differentiation here. They lump big criminals, petty criminals, good people, crooked lawyers and politicians, all because “they have no conscience” which is a religious term and should have no basis in a scientific journal in that it can not be seen, much less measured.

      Psychological study at it’s very best.

      I have a good reason for not trusting NTs. I learnt the hard lesson not to, a long long time ago. I love people, you just have to prove your worth, and no man is truly equal to another, no matter how much Karl Marx says its true.

      Like

      • @GeneticPsycho (Tina) 17:18 on December 2, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        You have never met anyone as objective as me in regards to living openly with psychopaths. You write with such contempt that it is an unwelcome read. Psychopaths have such a hard time with conversation. What is so pathetic about my life? Please give details. That you care not for my sense of justice or ethics makes no difference because you are stuck with us. Your very limited understanding of the disturbing feeling of conscience makes you disregard it as a religious term, when in fact it is a physical phenomenon of the NT nervous system. You are the one who comes across as dumb and trapped. It is best for you to hide because you are the weak one. And I say that without the slightest flicker of emotionality towards the subject. Now I’m bored.

        Like

    • Andrew 15:01 on December 4, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      This site is full of your responses to one thing or another. Can’t read a single post without your ridiculous comments about the wonders of feelings and empathy. Do you own this site? The way you act sort of reminds me of the you-go-girl culture prevalent in the west today.

      You have never met anyone as objective as me in regards to living openly with psychopaths-@GeneticPsycho (Tina) 14:18 on December 2, 2016.

      After forcing myself to read some of the snot that you post here, I am not so sure about that. You would give whatever group you were a part of, a bad name. Misery loves company, so I am pretty sure you won’t be lonely. There will be a lot of “victims” wishing for “protection” who will be a part of your group against “those without a conscience”

      James has made a mistake in engaging you in numerous times. I doubt you ever really read what he writes before you look for one thing to prove him, anyone else who vaguely disagrees with your tightly held beliefs about life.

      There are places where people like you are not allowed to comment on blogs. And it is precisely because of what you seem to have done here. You spam anyone who tries to discuss anything. You seem to give little thought to anything you say. Everything you say is calculated for effect value only. It has no purpose to inform or even to discuss. You distract attention from issues being discussed, back towards yourself.

      If anything Tina, you would be the real psychopath on this site. You try to terrorize anybody who doesn’t agree with you. In fact, I will now nickname you, PsychoTina. I have never met anyone as objective as PsychoTina about psychopaths, because you are the real psychopath here. You are the only one who fits all of these traits to a T.

      PsychoTina, you are the only actual Psychopath on this site.

      Like

      • @GeneticPsycho (Tina) 05:37 on December 10, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        You don’t even realize how disordered your thoughts are. (Psychopaths contradict themselves.) You start out by saying I’m full of feelings and empathetic, then you end by saying I’m a psychopath. Typical psychopathic raving.

        Like

    • andrew 22:40 on December 11, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Your disordered and childishly simplistic thinking has been exposed for one and all to see. Thanks for illustrating why you must not submit to testing and whatawaits you if you put yourself in the hands of our “loving” and “empathic” brethren.
      One day we might have a world that runs on empathy, on that day, only the victims will have rights, and they will be entitled to everything because they “need it”-oh wait, we live in that world today. We have hell on earth today.

      Empathy as preached by Jezebels like yourself, not good forthis planet.

      Like

      • @GeneticPsycho (Tina) 01:49 on December 12, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        Ok, throw in a little name-calling and the expected psychopath tantrum. It is also a psychopathic trait to see the world as black and white. According to you, the world runs on empathy. Wrong. Regular people have empathy for their family, friends, and chosen group. Outside of that, there is little empathy, but it can be taught. As opposed to psychopaths who have no empathy, not even for family. People who are capable of destroying their own family are even more capable of destroying all of society.

        Someday, with awareness training, we won’t need MRI psychopath testing of politicians because everyone will see you psychopaths plainly.

        Like

    • andrew 03:08 on December 12, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      Tina, you don’t get the point at all. This empathy stuff, ok. What does empathy have to do with dealing with criminal activity? Prosecute all crimes! You were obviously betrayed by someone, and it really stung. So what are you going to do now? Start a witch hunt on peoplr like him? Has it occurred to you how more fulfilled your life would have been had you simply moved on?
      Why are you so concerned with how people conduct their lives? It would make sense to help them when you have set your own life in order, and youndefinitely have some personal problems of your own from the looks of it.
      How much history have you really read? How much do you really know about government? About western civilization? About the last 2500 years of it?Do you know how and why those civilizations collapsed, amd what the politicians of those times did?
      You are taking a faulty study by Dr. Hare, and implementing the solution with absolutely no thought of practical comsequemces, or even real life practical merits, the ones that I point out, see you gross over, and you are too busy looking for the psychopath to see the truth.
      Until you employ some effort, and study the efforts employed by men in forming a civilization, you should not sit there with your holier-than-thou attitude bashing a small minority of people. All cilizations werenstarted by a single individual or a small group of people. All inventions weredone by single people who had to fight the minority to be given a voice. Get that right. Only individuals, figjting againt a majority of people, have ever built anything of value on this planet. Prove me wrongnTina. Go ahead.
      The study of psychopaths, as done today, is a faulty study. That’s not to say we don’t have a criminal element in society, but it is not who you think it is.
      Tina, do your homework. It might a while to do it. A person should understand what problem they are trying to solve, and I am challenging you to do it, for real. If you really care about people, find out for yourself the efforts they habe spnt creating civilizations in the last 2000 years.

      Like

      • @GeneticPsycho (Tina) 08:52 on December 12, 2016 Permalink | Reply

        You assume a lot by saying: “You were obviously betrayed by someone, and it really stung. So what are you going to do now? Start a witch hunt on people like him? Has it occurred to you how more fulfilled your life would have been had you simply moved on?
        Why are you so concerned with how people conduct their lives? It would make sense to help them when you have set your own life in order, and you definitely have some personal problems of your own from the looks of it.”

        None of that microfiction makes any sense since you don’t know anything about me. I grew up in a family of psychopaths. I personally know well a large number of psychopaths. That is where my study comes from, not Dr. Hare. What I want is a level playing field where everyone knows what psychopaths really are – not psychotic serial killers – but, just people who think that the rest of us are their weak little playthings. I have said nothing about psychopaths being the criminal element of society.

        This is me – personal problems and all, moving on happily, setting my life in order. Get over it.

        Like

    • andrew 11:22 on December 13, 2016 Permalink | Reply

      I don’t know about you, but I know what personal info I have gathered from a cursory look at your site. I did get that info from your site. The raison d’etre of your site. Thanks for the info on how you think and how you arrive at your conclusions.
      I could complain about the prejudice you, and a lot of others have, but I am glad to have the info so I am forewarned about those who have had their feelings hurt,and base their life’s mission on negative episodes. Nothing wrong with that, of course.
      Keep up with the good work, I will visit to check up periodically. It’s always a good thing to check up on different places to see how things are getting along.
      As a human being to another, I wish you success in your life’s mission as far as YOU are concerned. As far as anything else, it’s up to you.
      The road to evil is paved witj good intentions…….TOWARDS OTHERS

      Like

  • Barbara 06:45 on May 28, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , comment bait, , , ,   

    Online Harassment and Cyberstalking 

    A Real Life Problem

    The Internet is a wonderful place to work, play and study. But don’t let that fact make you blind to its down side. The Net is no more and no less than a mirror of the real world, and that means it also contains electronic versions of real life problems. Stalking and harassments are problems that many people especially women, are familiar with in real life. These problems can also occur on the Internet, in what has become know as “cyberstalking” or “online harassment”.

    If you thought that owning a computer and having an Internet account would make a person considerate and respectful; then think again. There are just as many predators in cyberspace as anywhere else. It is only their methods that have changed. Some predators might harass you by trailing around after you in live channels like lovesick puppies; unable to take NO for an answer and pestering you with email messages. In other cases this harassment may become a systematic campaign against you; where your harasser bombards you with threatening messages of hate and obscenities. Although distressful enough, the situation can even escalate to the point where your harasser traces your home address and telephone number; causing you to face not just emotional distress but also physical danger. It should come as no surprise to you that the “bad guys” are making use of this wonderful technology to harass people and prey on the innocent. Why wouldn’t they? Not all bad guys are street punks with no education. Some are university graduates with computers.

    There have been many examples of cyberstalking crossing over to “IRL” stalking (In Real Life stalking). Sadly, those users who have been victims of cyberstalking, tell a similar story: That no one took the harassment seriously until it became “IRL”. Cyberstalking can be a devastating experience for a person online. As they discover that the difference between the “Brave New World” of the Internet and the Real World is that in the real world people listen when you tell them you are being stalked and harassed. In cyberspace people say things like “well just turn off your computer”. Such incomprehension is common. “You can’t be hurt on the Internet – it’s just words” is commonly heard and “If you can’t handle it, then you shouldn’t be online” is another commonly hear comment. The online stalking is just as frightening and distressing as off-line stalking, and just as illegal.

    Men and women may be stalked on-line, but statistics show that the majority of victims are female. Women are the minority of the Internet population which means that their attention is generally a fierce competition between male users. This part of the Internet, resembles crude online single bars, with little in the way of politeness. Unfortunately the immediate and relative anonymity of live chat communications facilities enable users to be rude and insensitive. Cyberstalking and online harassment are also much easier to practice than real life stalking. In cyberspace, a stalker can harass their victim without ever have to leave the comfort of their own home, or have any witnesses to the incidents.

    One reason for the lack of successful prosecution of cyberstalkers, is that there usually is a lack of sufficient evidence available for the officials to warrant “probable cause” in order to further investigate. Many law enforcement agencies are Internet illiterate, therefore unaware that the problem could and does exist. To date, the only legislation regarding cyberstalking is the Communications Decency Act, enacted by the US Congress on 2-1-96, and is still being challenged in the Supreme Court. The real life, anti-stalking laws deal with actual attacks, and until such an attack happens, are actually very limited in defending yourself, or preventing any progression of the stalker. There is very little done about threats or harassment in the early stages.

    Online users are vulnerable to being targeted as cyberstalking victims in three areas.

    1) Live Chats (Facebook, Yahoo, Skype, Messenger) or IRC (Internet Relay Chat): in which a user talks live with other users. This is the most common place for cyberstalking.

    2) Message boards, Blogs, Reunion Sites, Support Groups and Newsgroups: a user interacts with others by posting messages, conversing back and forth.  Boards for emotional issues such as divorce; death; domestic violence are especially prone.  Disordered persons can track others they disagree with for years reeking all sorts of havoc.

    3) Email box: a user has the ability to write anything and even attach files to the email.

    Example: a user enables your email, via live chat or newsgroup postings, then emails you with obscenities, and attaches porno pictures. A common area regarding cyberstalking is at the “edu” sites, which are educational institutes, such as colleges and universities.

    One user might know another user personally and interacts on the Internet anonymously, so starting the cyberstalk. One student can enter the Internet as easily as another student, therefore not letting his true identity be known. And since user names can be unknown alias, who would ever know the identity or be able to prove the identity. In such cases, the stalker usually has the ability to trace the victim’s phone number and sometimes the address of his victim. Another includes interpreting a posting you may have made on a message board regarding your opinion as an “attack” if it differs from theirs. The stalker then becomes fixated on proving you wrong.

    Other forms of online harassment:

    1) Unsolicited email

    2) Live Chat

    3) Hostile Postings about you, using a few “facts” to make an untrue picture

    4) Spreading vicious, fabricated, untrue rumors about you (as opposed to telling the Truth at exposure sites)

    5) Leaving untrue messages on site guestbooks

    6) Impersonation of you online

    7) Electronic sabotage, (sending viruses, trojans, etc)

    8) Threatening phone calls

    9) Threatening mail

    10) Vandalism of property

    11) Physical attack

    12) Posing as you on groups, in emails or in postings.

    There are many precautions that you can take NOW to protect yourself in advance from the unwelcome attention of a cyberstalker. Remember: The goal of a cyberstalker is CONTROL. Your task is to reverse this situation. Keep control of who you communicate with on the Internet. To do this, you may like to consider the advice below. Remember, the time to deal with cyberstalking is before you become a target.

    CYBERSTALKING PREVENTION TIPS

    If you are being harassed online by a cyberstalker, the chances are that you are not the first person they have stalked. Cyberstalkers, like other predators, are opportunists. They know what they are looking for and how to get it. “Stalking” is a “power” crime, the stalkers has the power to make you suffer and enjoys that power. Stalkers’ self-esteem rises when they attack your self- esteem. The more pain and suffering they can cause, the better they feel about themselves. The best protection against becoming a target of stalking is not to reveal anything personal that you might have in common. Often, stalkers are mentally unstable, paranoid, delusional, and extremely jealous, and have extremely low self-esteem. Stalkers may display selfishness, malice, sadism, be very cunning and arrogant. Most are anti-social, and to put it in layman’s terms, be a “control freak”, enjoying manipulating other people. They crave power over others, and enjoy the type power that hurts other people. harassment is common enough in live chat on the Internet.

    The three most common ways it can start are:

    1) sexual harassment (or innuendo);

    2) a flame war (argument that gets out of hand);

    3)users that show their technological power by attacking innocent users, channels or even networks.

    Those who regularly start flame wars online are rude and obnoxious people, often having poor social and communication skills. Their idea of fun is throwing obscene abuse at another just to upset them. These kind of harassers are often loners who don”t have a companion and their attempts to attract your attention is often clumsy and crude. Care should always be taken when turning the away, as the are highly sensitive to rejection and humiliation, and could cause a vendetta to start against you. Understand that although clumsy and crude in most cases, the stalker is not stupid, they are very organized and usually experienced in their war against you.

    Stalking is a form of obsession. The difference between a normal cyber harasser and a cyberstalker, is this: harasser moves on to others and forgets you and a stalkers will come back to stalk you another day.

    The Internet enables the stalker, his powers, in most cases, merely a knowledge of the technology is all required to have the ability to stalk another user. Most stalkers, having been rejected desire to instill fear in users, therefore, upsetting the normal enjoyment of the Internet.

    Note that educated, smooth talking, responsible people also can be stalkers, appearing to be a perfect gentleman or lady with perfect manners. The major “clue” to cyberstalking, is when the stalker pushes for information regarding you personal life, private life, or life away from the net. Rule of thumb, as it may be referred to is: “NEVER GIVE ANY PERSONAL INFORMATION ACROSS THE INTERNET!”

    Online meetings should stay online, the individuals are, in fact, strangers. Online, the physical warning signs usually in the “body language” are missing. Also the clues of personality within the voice and eyes are missing. All there is to determine a personality is the skill in which they type there messages. There is no code of honor in protecting privacy on the Internet. Each user should therefore take steps to protect their privacy online.

    1) never specify gender

    2) use neutral-gender names

    3) change your password often

    4) edit your online profiles often

    5) review your email headers and signatures often

    6) use secure chat programs that do not permit tracking of your isp#

    7) use a good chat network

    8) use standard names, passive names to as to not draw attention to you

    9) use anonymous remailers

    10)use an anonymous browser

    11)use encryption to authenticate email

    12) discuss privacy with your server.

    And last: learn your technology. REMEMBER: PROTECT YOURSELF!

    GRAFX-SPECS DESIGN & HOSTING

     
  • James 13:15 on April 30, 2015 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: comment bait, , objectification, , , , villain clichés   

    How a psychopath views you 

    One of the reasons I’m allowed here is the extent to which I am able to ‘reveal’ or illuminate the psychopathic condition through not only what I say but how I say it. Some posts, through their subject matter, will reveal more than others. That is not something which especially interests me, but since it’s important to someone, it is fair to say that this is probably one of those extra-revelatory posts.  

    People are resources to be used like any other. But they’re not all the same, they are individuals. I don’t need to label them in order to interact with them. All the same, for the people I come into contact with, I categorise them into four different groups based on their value to me. I say “I categorise them”, it’s not something I’m overly conscious of, but when I interact with a specific person I conceptualise and treat them based on their group. And like I said, I’m not talking about people’s objective value, just their value in relation to my needs and wants.

    So enough waffling already, what are the groups?

    • Useful – people to be used for something of value they have. They’re a pretty common type. Analogous with tools.
    • Entertainment – people with whom I interact for pleasure. Not too many at the minute, though obviously their number goes up and down as people come and go. Analogous with toys, and in some favourable cases, pets.
    • Threat – people who may cause problems for my wellbeing. The least common group by far.
    • Unimportant – people who have no value, either positive or negative, to me. Basically most people on the planet.

    One issue with this list is it could be argued that entertainment is just a more specific form of usefulness; the person’s utility lies in their entertainment value.  People whose entertainment value is very great may become my friends. I’ll have to talk about friends in another post.

    So which are you? Well, you’re reading this so I guess you’re helping to support one of my hobbies, which makes you a cause of my entertainment. On the other hand, most of you are silent readers and for all I know you’re not the same crowd from week to week, which would make the individual reader rather unimportant. Nevertheless, that status belies how I really feel about you who read my posts; I greatly value your continued interest in what I’ve got to say – why else would I write?

    Should you leave a comment, you’d certainly stand a good chance of an upgrade. And you’d be able to tell whether it worked from my reaction. If I reply, you’ve become entertainment in yourself. It doesn’t take much, just a comment that isn’t completely unintelligible or boring. Who knows, you may even share information so valuable that you become useful, for a while.

    You can of course be more than one thing at a time; people I make use of may also be people I like. It’s when you’re just the former but you think you’re the latter where problems are generated – for you. So if you had a really charming friend or lover who left you one day without a backward glance, and whom you now believe to be a psychopath, it was almost certainly the case that you were only being used for whatever your ‘friend’ or ‘lover’ wanted at the time. When they left, it was because they decided that – what is that phrase again? – your usefulness was at an end. Still, at least they didn’t snap you in half on their knee.

    Unimportant or not, your views are bound to interest someone. So leave a comment! 

     
    • Mike 17:27 on September 29, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Hi Amaterasu. Apologies long time to reply again. Mmm, interesting. Went to see a therapst & apparantlly I’m a borderline whatever that means. Ok, so, am I choosing to anger ? Mmm, it presupposes I have control over my emotions, yet anger to me feels like a reaction. If tell myself to choose to react different I feel I’m trying to suppress the cells I’m made of which are telling me it’s a threat/enemy of my ex girlfriend rather like a caveman or jellyfish response to danger who has a nasty effect on my ability to feel equilibrium. In other words all I feel is rage. I will try to tell myself, no Mike, now stop it, you’ve just walked past & seen the nasty piece of crap who’s continuing to pester me by being in my area when she doesn’t even live there now, stay ca,m and ,ok, I choose to feel forgiveness and pleasure and peaceful. Ok, in theory it might work, but what do I do when 5 seconds later, whaaam, sod that and the anger smacks me straight in the face again ! See the problem 😡 but yes, thanks, I will definitely try your suggestion. By the way , is that a DBT technique?

      Like

      • Amaterasu Solar 17:34 on September 29, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        From the time something emotionally impactful occurs to the time You can take control is 2 seconds. Yes, once those two seconds pass, what You choose to think about and how You choose to think about what You choose to think about allow You to control the feelings You have, including anger. You don’t tell Yourself to choose differently… You ask Yourself if there is a better choice and let Your subconscious work on it. As for the “technique…” I don’t know what “DBT” is. I arrived at My awareness through reading William Glasser’s Choice Theory (which is more a fact than a theory, based on My experiments with it…).

        Like

    • Mike 15:38 on October 1, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      I’ll check out this a William Glasser’s book. So see her, get angry and what, count to 2 ?

      Like

      • Amaterasu Solar 17:30 on October 1, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        As soon as You can, choose to think of something that makes You feel good – I usually think of kittens! LOL! – that has nothing to do with Her. Keep going back to that thought if You find You are thinking about Her. That’s one way. Or, think something like, Isn’t She pathetic, being there again! LOLOL! Meh, She’s irrelevant to Me! What You choose to think about and how You choose to think about what You choose to think about… Here’s a vid I did about that:

        Let Me know Your thoughts.

        Like

    • Mike 23:53 on October 2, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      I like the concept of thinking something else when I walk past or see her by chance thanks I will certainly try it. Bit here’s the thing. I still feel like it’s forced although I certainly do believe that our thoughts form pathways in the brain & continually thinking painful thoughts strengthens & makes them worse . Yes , so by this token your suggestion makes logical sense. I will watch the video thanks & mail you after I’ve seen it. The only trouble I have with the Ida of thinking these different thoughts is that they are not my true feeling. Therefore I will be in a sense lying to myself. My true feelings tell me I want her to be accused of sexualy harassing men, inform her husband she is cheating & lying to him, & text her warning her not to pester me. That might make her realise how trying to dupe people doesn’t work. It’s the only language she would probably understand. I won’t do it because I have resoect for my higher self. But I suspect one day she’ll get her Karma by messing around someone worse than her at a time when she is weak. Haha, ok, now I’ve gone all borderline again (this is the psycho website right so what the heck) anyway, back to your suggestion. Thank you very much I will look at it this week. By the way, yes I’d love her to be different & get back with her in theory, but no I’m not pining after her, this is about anger & feeling abused by an idiot who refuses to speak because they don’t want to hear any truth that puts them in a bad light. I hate that, literally hate it .

      Like

      • Amaterasu Solar 10:26 on October 3, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        You speak of “true feelings….” What are One’s “true feelings” but what One is feeling in the Now? If One is not thinking of things that upset One, One’s true feelings are those One feels about what One is thinking. If One changes how One is thinking about what One is thinking, One’s true feelings are those that are elicited by the thought process.

        Like

    • Mike 12:31 on October 3, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      It works in theory. Perhaos not so with borderlines. No meter what I try ultimately my feelings or ‘reactions’ break through into the Now. I watched a bit of Glasser. I approve of it, nits something to use alongside being human as a sort of coping skill in my view , but it’s sort of impossible to be ‘completely ‘ zoomed out on it as humans we need to opine and let off steam etc. In that sense it almost whacks of a cult or a religion. But I do think it has value, I tried it today as I walked by. She wasn’t there thank F. Anyway I thought of kittens then I told myself she is a loser becasue she lost someone she said she loved (me) Then I walked past, then the pain blame critisism need to bribe etc … hate disgust pain and longing all came back as soon as I stopped thinking it !

      Like

      • Amaterasu Solar 14:33 on October 3, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        Do understand that it does take practice – old pathways take a while to overwrite. As I mentioned, it took a while to stop choosing to depress. But eventually the new pathways were established – took a few months, as I had spent a couple decades building the depression pathways. Keep at it, and give it a bit of time. I think You will find that it works…

        Like

    • Mike 13:51 on October 4, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Mmm, ,maybe a bit

      Liked by 1 person

  • James 16:14 on October 4, 2017 Permalink | Reply

    Life would be no fun without a bit of misery. I like to think we psychopaths help to add to the richness of life. Can certainly understand why others wouldn’t agree with that, however.

    One thing we can perhaps all agree on is that you can’t expect a new coping technique, as recommended by Amaterasu, to work after just mere seconds of trying it out. These things take time. Think of it like learning a new skill; you can’t just read a book on (say) Japanese, and then expect to be able to go to Japan and speak to everyone in their language fluently. You need to practise; only then can you get good at Japanese, and only with practice can you train your mind into reacting in a more productive way which serves you well.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Amaterasu Solar 20:56 on October 4, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Yes, James, I would not agree that life would be no fun without a bit of misery. My life was very rich without misery. It’s rich now only by virtue of My work to solve for psychopaths in control. Other than that, it is quite poor.

      Like

  • Mike 18:46 on October 7, 2017 Permalink | Reply

    Hehe,nice one, Is a borderline the same as a psychopath ?

    Liked by 1 person

    • James 13:07 on October 8, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Not at all, but there are similarities. Both are considered to be cluster B personality disorders (well “psychopathy” is actually called antisocial personality disorder in that sense) along with narcissistic personality disorder and histrionic personality disorder.

      Like

      • Mike 16:35 on October 10, 2017 Permalink | Reply

        Mmm, yeah I always thought there was something different about me. Apparently I’m narsisitc as well. What are the similarities?

        Like

  • Mike 21:21 on October 12, 2017 Permalink | Reply

    Hehe, yeah that’s right. Interesting, I’ll take a look

    Like

  • Mike 00:46 on October 13, 2017 Permalink | Reply

    So James, I wonder if its possible to get even with an ex partner if they are a psychopath playing the devalue & discard routine

    Like

    • James 05:46 on October 13, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Just murder her I suppose 😉

      Like

  • Mike 01:34 on October 14, 2017 Permalink | Reply

    Like

  • Mike 12:32 on October 14, 2017 Permalink | Reply

    Well i wont kill her. Maybe I’ll just write her husband a nice little letter exposing his wife’s lying and cheating . Haha. Love to see the look on her stupid face when he confronts her. Classic. I’d like to film ot and put on youtube 🙂 I could watch it over and over and show it to all my friends and post it to all her friends. Oh well, I suppose ill just have to let the stuupid cow just get away with it. Nevermind

    Liked by 1 person

  • Remia 08:21 on November 6, 2017 Permalink | Reply

    How interesting. Last year someone asked me how I viewed other people and I said to him “Useful as a tool, useful as entertainment, a threat, or completely useless to me”. This was when I was fifteen and I always believed that everyone secretly feels this way but few readily accept this viewpoint. I never really knew that these views were exclusive to psychopaths

    Like

    • James 13:02 on November 6, 2017 Permalink | Reply

      Then you’re learning. Knowledge is power. Good luck to you.

      Like

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